T-shirts
A
brilliantly versatile garment that can be used as a base for many occasional
outfit. Some come with alternatively cut neck holes, now everyone can show the
part between their nipples and still look cool.
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| Photo courtesy of SaturdayNightLive |
Despite
this, T-shirts are out of the question. God forbid someone thinks you rolled
the sleeves up because they are too long and getting in the way. I think the
best alternative is a vest, completely removing the controversial sleeve and
still allowing for the lustrous V neck.
Mandarins
Delicious
fruit with a succulent composition. Also has an entertainment factor in the
peeling of the citrus sphere; you can create shapes out of the peel, such as
penises (Ha!). That’s not the only thing that peel is useful for either,
squeeze the peel in a certain way and you have your own peel water pistol. The
actual segments are cool too.
Regrettably,
there is too much controversy surrounding this particular fruit. Countless
times I have been part of or been witness to the 'mandarin vs. satsuma vs.
tangerine vs. orange' argument. Which ones which? Who knows? It’s probably best
to stick to the distinct apple.
Sport
Great for
improving ones physical form while also enjoying yourself. Sport has so much
variation and versatility, ranging from football sport to fencing sport and
then back to snooker. The enjoyment involved isn't limited to personal either,
team sport encourages crowd amusement also.
There is a
down side however, these activities greatly exclude the elderly and the
infantile. These demographics lack the bodily capacity to compete let alone
just join in. My recommended replacement is reading or chess. Both vastly
accessible and stimulating.
Gengahr
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| Photo courtesy of UNRecorded.com |
Wonderfully
ethereal vocals backed with an interesting squeaky indie jam backing. Gives you
that boogie feeling while also making you want to lie down on an array of
pillows and abuse benzos.
Why you
shouldn't listen to it: You will want to sing along. Unfortunately, due to the
falsetto style of vocals, you will sound like a prick. Substitute with
Jungle/DnB for a confident and unselfconscious experience.
(London based and just released an EP on Transgressive
records)
Written By: Tom Bucknall
